During their lives, women have many expectations, they have to meet in so many areas, meanwhile, they must not lose themselves, but it is still good if they can constantly renew themselves. That is why more and more women are experiencing the panic of closing the gate. What and how can be done about it? Coach Mónika Fischer helped answer the questions.
Please describe what a coach does.
We can look at coaching as both a profession and a methodology. In the case of the former, the coach can deal with residential clients, where the client is the client themself, and can also work for companies, where the client is not the client, but, for example, the company manager assigns a coach to talk to the employees to increase efficiency.
If we use coaching as a methodology, we use the terms language coach, presentation coach, health coach, or leader with a coaching approach. This means, very simply, that we emphasize the questioning technique, we approach our colleagues with understanding attention, we know the tools of assertive communication and so on.
As a coach, what problems do you encounter most often?
Most often, I solve the problems of career changers, who have cherished a dream for a long time but do not know the best way to realize it. Take, for example, someone who is employed and sews clothes as a hobby in their spare time. Over time, more and more people come to them to make unique clothes, and she thinks about quitting their job so that she can devote more time to the activity she loves. Many questions are formulated in it: will you have enough customers, will you be able to handle the pace, will you love it even if you only deal with it all day, at what price should you work, where should you get the material and so on. So the given person is already the “Should I cancel?” you can also visit a coach to decide a question and consult with a business coach (or business developer) later after the decision has been made.
Would you highlight some specific issues?
One such problem is the return of women over 30 with small children to the labor market. The problem is that they are often not expected to return to the position from which they left for maternity leave, and it is also difficult to solve family logistics with working hours from 9 to 17. The other reason is more of an emotional origin, childbirth brings out women’s desire for creativity and self-realization, so they cannot even imagine themselves in the monotonous workplace, working for a goal with which they can no longer identify.
The other problem is career change over 40, which can be caused by menopause, mid-life crisis, burnout at work, that is, a general panic of closing the door, that this is the last chance to create something lasting, to build a legacy.
None of these are unsolvable problems, but it is important to talk to the family members affected by our decision before consulting a specialist, to inform them about what concerns us because such a serious decision affects all areas of our lives, not just our source of income.
A few weeks ago, in an interview with the Szegedi Nap, a mental health specialist talked about the fact that, fortunately, more and more people recognize when they are not well. Can you confirm this as well?
I can neither confirm nor deny it – joking aside, I can sense the change on an individual level, but unfortunately I cannot provide accurate statistical data. At the level of impression, I agree with the interviewee that it seems that more people are looking for a support specialist sooner and easier.
What is the main reason for this? Do we dare to ask for help?
I think that, on the one hand, the concept of maintaining mental health has become normalized, and on the other hand, the services of support professionals have become more accessible. The idea is widespread that if I’m not well, I don’t have to deal with it alone, but I can go to someone who has this profession to help me get better mentally.
In conclusion: what do you recommend when someone chooses a coach instead of a psychologist or a mental health specialist?
It is worth contacting a coach if we can formulate our problem in the present tense. In other words, we don’t look for the answers to the whys in the past, but we want to solve the blockages of the present to build the kind of future we want. The coach helps us to narrow down our many wandering thoughts to one topic, clarify the real blockage, formulate the objective, and then develop the steps to achieve it.
Translated from Pósa Tamara’s article at Szegedi Nap page.
Photo: Yvette Frank
